To kill a mosquito

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757px-Aedes_aegypti_biting_human Well, Google has a result for each and every phrase that you can think of. I just keyed in “To kill a mosquito”, and hit enter. It showed me 11,90,000 results. Can you believe this? I went through some of them. They were really really good, hilarious and funny. But, they mentioned about the out-dated techniques which we already know.  http://www.wikihow.com/Kill-a-Mosquito I think I am the world’s most innovative and the best mosquito killers. Let me tell you that most of the times, I let them go away after donating a drop of my A+ blood. It gives me a sense of pleasure. But, there are times, when I really get pissed from a mosquito bite. Some of them are really so painful, that I wish I had a shot-gun. Some of them just don’t know how to bite without causing any itches or prick. Those are the ones that I hunt for. And believe me, I have a record of 100% strike rate. Hahahaha. 1. First method (Rating : Easy) – When you feel the sting, do not move. Let them stick their trunk inside you. Let them extract a drop of blood from you. When they are done, they will draw their trunks back, and try to fly away. This is the moment. They really get heavy, and so are not able to fly at their top speed. A small splat and we regain all of your blood. This method is effective for people with low reflexes. Drawback if this method: Blood all over. 2. Second method (Rating : Intermediate) – While the guy starts drilling into your skin, they become immobile for a very short duration. Hit them!! This method overcomes the drawback of the previous method. Clean termination!!! 3. Third method (Rating : Advanced) – This is the most difficult for people who have poor hand-eye co-ordination. Killing a mosquito while it is flying requires you to be as quick as Mithun Daa. You keep following it’s trajectory, and when you are sure that you can extrapolate it’s trajectory, you are ready to go. Cup your hands around the guy, and smear it to death. 4. Fourth Method (Rating : Genius) – Target destroyed with 2 fingers. Most of the time I use this technique. While in flight, use only two of your fingers and try to catch them while in flight. This is my favourite method. 🙂 5. Catch them live : If you manage to catch one of them live, break their legs, or one of their wings. This is the most violent and torturous thing to do. I used this technique till I was 10.

1 thought on “To kill a mosquito

  1. Anonymous

    "You r d best mosquito killer…."

    all mosiquotes will die laughing after hearing this…. 🙂

    Reply

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